“Ooh Mommy, nice tushy! I love your tushy!” I was sitting at my desk, on my laptop scrolling through the nudes I posed for earlier this summer.
My first reaction was to shut the screen, “Ruby can’t see these, they’re inappropriate. I’m naked!” Yet my response surprised me, “Thank you Ruby. Come look with me. Can you believe you were in my belly?”
“We practiced yoga together in your belly and I drank milk from your boobies too! I love you all Mommy.” She added as she gazed at the images.
I knew then what I needed to do with the pictures. The appreciation and awe in my daughter’s voice and eyes is the way I hope she will always appreciate herself.
She didn’t see the pictures as anything other than beautiful. There was no judgment, no questioning, just acceptance and admiration. We could all learn from Ruby. There is nothing wrong with nudity. Let’s celebrate it.
I have chosen to live my life naked. At first, it was unconscious—it just happened; but now it is deliberate. I write naked, I live naked, I love being naked and that’s how I will raise my daughters.
There is a freedom I feel every day, knowing I have nothing to hide. My friends, family, students and strangers know my inner most thoughts and secrets. I don’t live on the surface anymore, I don’t waste time. When we meet, we go deep immediately. They are comfortable with me, as I am with them. Now that I know what it is like to live naked, I never want to suit up again.
My hope for my daughters is to grow up without the weight of self consciousness, loathing and deprecation. I am teaching them to embrace and honor their bodies and live in their sensuality. It is a blessing for a girl to be raised by a mother who is comfortable in her skin, her head and her heart. They will in turn become women who adore themselves and express themselves however they feel compelled.
I am pavinFor most of my life, I was afraid to love my body. In fact, I did everything I could not to love it. I was not loving my insides either. I’ve changed. I am no more naked in these photos than I am in my writings; it is the same in my perspective.
****
This short sequence of imagery captures (in form) my internal process when I write.
I sit as the quiet introvert consumed with apprehension, “Do I really want to expose this? Do I want to share something so intimate?”
As I write, I become more comfortable. I settle in. Without knowing, the cloth falls, the fear melts away, releasing my heart.
Unconsciously, the armor falls to the floor, unveiling the powerful goddess who patiently awaits her entrance.
I am as powerful as I am vulnerable.
Since I can recall, my back body has always felt more private and fragile than my front body. When I see this picture of myself in high heels, no make up, bare and raw, my hands against the window it reminds me of how I feel when I release my writing into the world.
There is no one to protect me, I am completely exposed. I can’t use my hands to cover up. I can’t predict the reaction, all I can do is trust myself and my intention. I can’t fight back or defend, I can only stand there, naked.
There comes a time if and when we are ready, we will be granted a glimpse of ourselves as the world sees us.
This last week, I received this gift. I saw myself through my daughter’s eyes—I am beautiful from the inside out and the outside in.I love myself for everything I am and everything I’m not. This is me, naked.
From: Removed link as it no longer exist