Adventures in Gigging: Nudist Colony

[chrisw91]

ME: Well, after a lot of phone calls this week, I got one gig that I just had to tell you about. I saw an ad for a resort booking a music festival, so I sent them my standard email. They got right back to me and said my music was amazing. But the gig doesn't pay. Just a tip jar, dinner and the "opportunity" to sell CDs.

MUSICIAN: Hate when that happens. False advertising.

ME: I know! Why don't they save me some time by saying up front it's a nonpaying gig? There should be a rule on Craigslist about that. But here's the funny thing about the resort: It's clothing-optional!

MUSICIAN: A nudist colony? Why didn't you say so?

ME: Well, I thought to myself maybe my husband would want to go. He's said for years he wanted to go to a nudist colony. Here's our chance, all expenses paid! They said they'd feed us and let us use the hot tubs.

MUSICIAN: So are you going?

ME: No. When I told my husband he said, "We don't need a vacation, we need money!"

MUSICIAN: So have you turned down the gig?

ME: Nah, haven't gotten back to them yet.

MUSICIAN: Then let's do it! I'll do a duo with you!

ME: I bet you would.

MUSICIAN: Come on now, think how you could start off 2009 with this great gig at a nudist colony. That's what I call starting the year off right!

ME: You know, we don't PLAY nude, it's just the audience that's nude. Or partially nude.

MUSICIAN: Yeah, and then after we can sit in the hot tub.

ME: Yeah, right. And stay overnight in the yurt they provide.

MUSICIAN: They provide a yurt? This is getting better and better.

ME: I can only imagine doing a jazz gig at this place.

MUSICIAN: I would love to go to a nudist colony. I've been to a swingers party.

ME: Thank you for sharing.

MUSICIAN: I'm just saying...

ME: You know, it's not a sexual thing. These are just people who don't like clothes. And I know what you're thinking, but I would bet you $100 there isn't a single good-looking woman -- or man -- under 50 there. Or over 50.

MUSICIAN: So would you feel comfortable playing in the nude?

ME: I told you, the band doesn't play nude. But no, not really. Would you?

MUSICIAN: Afterwards, I'd tell everyone, "I love gigging with Alexa. She's so free. It's like she's getting it all off her chest."

ME: She doesn't keep her talent under wraps.

MUSICIAN: On stage she's so ... bare.

ME: I'm ending this conversation before you get yourself too worked up.

MUSICIAN: OK. Don't cancel that gig. In fact, give me the booker's name. I'm going to go do it myself.

I just read through this blog and thought, 'I would kill for an opportunity like this'. Unfortunately though the musician clearly doesn't understand nudism as well as the blogger did. She seemed to have a pretty good idea and seemed very open minded about it all which is great. The bit about there not being a single good-looking woman did kind of offend me though I'm sure it was said in jest. Anyway if you want to see the blog for yourself hear it is. http://alexajazz.blogspot.com/2009/01/adventures-in-gigging-nudist-colony.html
Let me know what you think about it.